Welcome to My path..Ketika Tuhan,Bunga,Cinta,cahaya,dan sastra menjadi kesayanganku

Welcome to My path..Ketika Tuhan,Bunga,Cinta,cahaya,dan sastra menjadi kesayanganku

Rabu, 26 Maret 2014

a letter to my 10 years old self.

Dear, 10 years old risma

Hey kids, now you must be freaking out by the final examination that will you faced in the middle of this may. or right at the moment when the rain season comes down. you should be grateful cause everything still okay there. the climate, the weather, everything. be grateful for how summer comes up every march until august and how your exciting of a rain season will be answered in the right time. september, until february. everything just like the way it used to be. every normal and so arranged. then express your gratitude. although you still 10 years old, you should pray more often. cause i know how you almost never pray each day, you just playing around and study. God watching you dear. :)

Btw, i owe you an apology cause of my hatred to a white milk already make you grow as a fat kid. cause by that, i make you drink chocolate milk during your childhood. so sorry for every insult that goes to you cause you are fat.  But, you're gonna meet someone who could waking up that self conscious of being fitter. he's an amazing guy who probably younger than you . he'll gave you strength to pass every hard days on your diet program. you're gonna be fitter even skinny right after you graduate from the elementary school or when you turn into 12 years old.

you'll face this random thing called 'puberty' u will become a little drama queen girl. you'll become the member of English club for the first time and doing a great job in it. at least great enough to make your teacher bring you to a pizza restaurant and hang out to cinema. you'll never forget her. your best teacher who gives you much more passion in English. and i'm proud of you for how you care about your study until you become "student of the year" in the second year of the Junior highschool. in the same year, you're gonna meet a new student from another school that involving you to some battle or fight. but it finally brings you to the further feeling such a care and, you will have no idea about how you're feeling towards him. but you guys just close enough and you're gonna care a lot about him although u didn't know how is his feeling onto you. but it doesn't matter. you guys are a good close friend.

btw, don't forget to watch HARRY POTTER, and don't miss a chance you talk about it to an oriental look girl with medium wavy hair that you firstly think that it such a messy hair. that's Conversation gonna brings her to become you life buddy. like really life buddy. you're gonna have several greatest best friend ever. but the greatest one will be your companion 'til you graduate fron junior highschool and you both gonna be in the same senior highschool. you'll never regret to meet this girl.

In Highschool , you're gonna continue your english club and decide to be in school english debating club. you will be an awful debater at the very beginning. but english parliamentary debate would be your new world, your new soul. you and your bestfriend gonna through the journey together , growing from a very awful debater until finally you guy got the 2nd winner position for twice and you'll become the best speaker.
you and her will also finally through a good holiday in Bogor with those students from netherland right at you 17 birthday. and your parent's permission would be the best Gift to you at that moment.

and by the time, you'll see soo many smart guy in this world. including your idol, SHERLOCK HOLMES. you will admire John Watson character and have a desire to marry a doctor. You imagine nothing about love story except a lovely life with a doctor as your husband. and your gonna serve and do all your cooking skill for make him a perfect meals right after he arrived at home with that white jacket and a stethoscope hanging around his neck. make him smile during his exhausting day with your amazing cooking skil. you're gonna love how his stethoscope will look so perfect between his collar bones and how he used his glasses.

and you're gonna meet a beautiful man who is a medical student and he'll become the only one man you can ever imagine to be whom you're gonna spend the rest of your life with. But, Overall, i'm proud of how you could get this far and i need you to work it out, continue your life, and keep loving yourself.

18 years Old Risma.

Kamis, 13 Maret 2014

renungan 2

hello my cyber buddy, :) it has been a long we are not talk to each other.  thanks for never being mad for my every betrayal. well, it's right 12.25 in the afternoon. i have nothing to feel but exhausted and sick. well, i need to tell a story that i've just through 'bout a couple of days ago.

well, something rare just happen to my family.and now i surrounded in the craziness of time.  My little brother and younger sister are got ill and both should be hospitalized in the same hospital. well, my sister's journey is not as easy as my brother's . while my brother already got a medical treatment and had a better condition. my sister didn't get the room easily. cause she's an adult and there's no room provided for her. i was sleepless in the first day of taking care of her . but the's not what i want to tell you about. i'm not going to tell in detail about how my head spinning around to visit about 3 or 4 hospital right near my hometown. i'm going to tell you everything i see in the hospital that some of it could freaking me out , tear me down and drop me a happy tears.

All i see in the hospital is just enhance my willingness and desire to really marry a doctor. while it's actually already become the dream of mine since i was kid.

when i just arrived in the emergency installation room. the sterile room and all the medical stuff scent just spoiling me up. it must be sounds really weird but that just happen. i love the hospital scent  the first thing that finally could freaking me out is a moan and scream in pain from all the patient. some of them start to remember God by spelling a prayer together with his family, and some of them just laid down on bed with no one beside him. but my sister be the one that just laid down, but she's with me at that moment.

you know what? all the things in this room are just made me realize how important is a family, a friend and healthiness. eventhough i love the smell of a hospital. but all i want right now is just go back to my family like the way it was. my health and normal family. my house seems so vacant, no laughter, cause everyone busy in hospital. and now i get ill as well. wish it's not a bad illness. cause i get closer to my final examination. no, it can't be. i should stay strong and health. cause i never feel needed by others this much. like everyone needs my help.

Sabtu, 22 Februari 2014

say something, 
i'm giving up on you. 

i'm gonna stay if want me to 

so please say something, 
i'm giving up on you. 

Selasa, 18 Februari 2014

JAHAT dan BERSALAH itu berbeda!! (Based on my direct interview at LP wanita tangerang)

Berdasarkan hasil kunjungan saya, Tentunya merupakan sebuah hal baru bagi saya bahwa Lembaga Permasyarakatan bukanlah sebuah ‘kandang’ atau ‘kurungan yang ditempati oleh orang-orang Jahat. Sehingga  Lembaga permasyarakatan berserta warga binaannya seolah menjadi momok menakutkan bagi orang-orang diluar sana. Seperti yang sudah saya saksikan sendiri, Lembaga permasyarakatan khususnya untuk para kaum hawa ini tidak dapat disebut sebagai penjara. Penampilannya terlihat lebih seperti sebuah sanggar atau sekolah. Dimana Warga Binaannya belajar mengenai banyak hal di berbagai bidang yang memang sudah terbukti dapat menuai prestasi dan hasil yang tentunya baik bagi mereka masing-masing mapun bagi lembaga permasyarakatan itu sendiri. Seperti ternak ikan lele, nila dan lain sebagainya mereka juga menyediakan wadah bagi bakat-bakat yang patut di bari apresiasi. Dari mulai Vocal group Hingga salon Kecantikan. Yang tentu tidak bisa saya sebutkan satu persatu
Dalam ruang lingkup yang begitu terbatas, tak lantas membatasi ruang kreativitas mereka. Sebutlah Sonya contohnya. Salah satu Warga binaan yang saya wawancara ini ternyata murni berdarah Iran. Tentunya Sonya adalah orang Asing pada awalnya. Gadis cantik yang telah mendekam selama kurang lebih 3 tahun ini mengaku, bahwa yang membuatnya terus terinspirasi dan berkarya di dalam lembaga permasyarakaan ini adalah Teman-teman di sekelilingnya yang terus memberi dukungan  dan memiliki semangat juang yang juga tinggi. Pada awal kedatangannya, Sonya sama sekali belum bisa berbahasa Indonesia .  Sonya menandaskan bahwa dirinya belajar bahasa dan Budaya Indonesia di dalam ‘sekolah baru’ nya ini. Seluruh warga binaan dengan sabar mengajarinya hingga sekarang dia sudah bisa berbahasa Indonesia dengan cukup baik.
Tidak Hanya dalam Hal bersosialisasi, Gadis berdarah timur tengah yang kita wawancarai ini pun Turut aktif dan memiliki minat tersendiri yang selalu ia kembangan di dalam lembaga permasyarakatan yang terletak di bilangan Tangerang ini. Sonya menyatakan bahwa dia kerap datang dengan sendirinya ke salon kecantikan yang berada di dalam lembaga permasyarakatan ini dan belajar secara rutin. Dari mulai menata rambut hingga massages , salah satu teman Sonya pun mensinyalir bahwa Sonya sendiri telah mendapatkan sertifikat dari Lembaga permasyarakatan tersebut sebagai bentuk pengapresiasian bagi dirinya beserta bakat yang dimiliki Sonya yang berarti Sonya memiliki Hak atau sebutlah sudah pantas untuk membawa Ilmunya untuk diajarkan keorang lain ketika ia sudah kembali menghirup udara segar. Hal ini cukup mengimpresi saya sebagai pelajar dan benar-benar merubah mindset saya tentang seorang warga binaan di sebuah Lembaga Permasyarakatan.
Kunjungan kali ini benar-benar membuka mata dan hati saya mengenai sudut pandang saya terhadap seorang warga binaan di sebuah Lembaga permasyarakatan seperti Sonya, yang mungkin bila dipandang secara parsial dan berdasarkan status tentu membuat takut dan segan , karena selama ini mereka dianggap sebagai orang jahat. “tidak semua yang di dalam sini itu orang jahat begitu pun sebaliknya, tidak semua yang berada diluat itu orang baik” Dengan Bahasa Indonesia yang belum fasih betul Sonya membuka percakapan dengan kalimat diatas yang benar-benar membuat saya tersadar akan pola fikir parsial yang saya gunakan diawal. Sonya sendiri merupakan contoh warga binaan yang teladan dan berhati lembut. Dia menegaskan, bahwa dia mencoba untuk menikmati keadaan yang telah menimpanya. Bahwa dia memang tidak memiliki pilihan lain. Sonya Bahkan mengatakan bahwa dia tidak ingin berkata ‘penjara’ itu sebenarnya nyaman. Tidak sama sekali. Sekalipun program yang berjalan sangat bagus dan efektif, namun sonya merasakan bahwa penjara tetap penjara. Dan tidak hanya sebuah lembaga permasyarakatan saja, dimanapun tempatnya, ketika kita hanya sendirian dan jauh dari semua keluarga beserta orang-orang yang kita sayangi tetaplah disebut sebagai sebuah ‘penjara’ bagi Sonya.  Tentu Kami sangat mengerti akan keadaan yang menimpa Sonya dan mungkin hampir semua warga binaan Di sini. Bagaimana sulitnya bersosialisasi dengan lingkungan yang masih sangat baru dan asing sendirian. Terlebih semua sanak saudara Sonya berada di Iran.  Dan tentunya dia harus terus berjuang di dalam lembaga permasyarakatan ini tanpa mereka. Hal ini terlihat dari mimik Wajah Sonya yang telihat miris sesekali  ketika bercerita mengenai bagaimana dia begitu merindukan sosok suami, anak dan sanak saudaranya. Ketika ditanya siapa yang menginspirasi dia untuk terus berjuang disini, dengan yakin dia berkata, “suami dan teman-teman saya disini”
Di sisi lain, Begitu banyak hal yang dapat kami pelajari dai sosok warga binaan yang kami wawancarai ini. Wajah sumringah seketika tergambar begitu dia ditanya mengenai Sosok R.A Kartini. Mungkin Sonya tidak mengetahui begitu banyak hal mengenai Pahlawan emansipasi wanita yang satu ini, Namun dia tahu betul bahwa R.A kartini memiliki peran besar dalam kemajuan wanita Indonesia. Dan Dapat dibilang sebagai wanita yang memiliki Jasa baik. Tak Lupa Sonya pun memaparkan bahwa Di Lembaga permasyarakatan itu pun diadakan banyak perayaan-perayaan menyambut hari kartini yang dia ikuti secara keseluruhan. Bahkan dia berhasil menjadi pemenang Abang None yang merupakan satu dari sekian banyak kompetisi yang dia ikuti.
Dari sinilah saya dapat menyimpulkan bahwa, Wanita Indonesia pada Dasarnya penuh karya dan kreatifitas. Hanya saja terkadang beberapa dari mereka Terbawa Arus yang salah. Dan lagi akan saya Tekankan, Definisi ‘Jahat’ dan ‘bersalah’ itu sangatlah berbeda.  Kita tidak bisa men generalisasi bahwa yang Salah tentulah orang Jahat. Ini merupakan Pola fikir yang harus diubah. Mereka Hanya dinyatakan ‘bersalah’ dan mendapat hukuman yang pantas. Kebesaran hati mereka untuk kemudian mengikuti kegiatan dan pelatihan-pelatihan secara baik selama bertahun-tahun dan jauh dari keluarga, menurut saya merupakan bentuk tanggung jawab yang luar Biasa. Jelas dari sini dapat dilihat keseriusan mereka untuk berubah dan mereka bukanlah orang jahat yang harus dihindari. Melainkan insan yang pernah melakukan salah, dan ingin diperbaiki.

BY: Rismala Sari

Senin, 03 Februari 2014

renungan 1

selamat sore, Tuhan, alam dan semua tetesan hujan yang sepertinya akhir-akhir ini sangat senang mengunjungi tanah air kami. duka citaku yang sangat mendalam untuk semua tubuh-tubuh kecil yang mungkin saat ini sedang bermimpi dalam gigil. setelah lamunannya tentang pekerjaan rumah yang tak kunjung selesai, atau perut yang tak lagi bisa terisi penuh seperti kehidupan yang sebelumnya. Tak mengerti apa maksud Tuhan, tapi kita manusia rasanya sudah terlalu tak tahu diri untuk menyalahkan tuhan. ini ulah kita sayang.. orang tua yang kalian cintai mungkin lupa ajarkan kita bagaimana cara berteman dengan lingkungan.. anak pintar, disekolah setiap pagi pasti guru kalian mengingatkan tentang pentingnya buang sampah pada tempatnya.. setelah semua normal, beritahu orang tua yang kalian kasihi itu ya.. ^_^ 

Bicara tentang hujan dan semua yang disebabkannya pada tubuh-tubuh tak bersalah itu, aku merasa munafik karena sebenarnya aku begitu menikmati hujan, dari mendung, hingga munculnya pelangi. bukan hanya karena sekolah ku mentolerir ketelatan siswanya, tetapi juga aroma tanah basah dan semua dedaunan yang berhias tetesan air. dan bukan hanya aku nampaknya, seorang pria lembut yang ayu pun menyukainya.

Iya Tuhan,  si pria yang sering menubruk pandanganku di setiap pagi tepat beberapa tahun kebelakang. setelah habis tenaga dan batinku terkuras jiwa kesayangan yang telah membuangku hidup-hidup dalam tumpukan sampah hingga tak sedikitpun hal terfikir di benakku selain membuangnya jauh-jauh kedalam lubang hitam penghisap hingga aku tak akan pernah bisa melihatnya lagi. aku memohon PadaMu juga untuk itu kan ? 

Aku kembali memikirkan pria ini Tuhan, yang biasa kutemui.. keindahannya memang tak bisa aku sangkal. sejak itu dia menjadi objek pemandangan favoritku. semua lekukan wajahnya sempurna, kulitnya seputih hujan, senyumnya lembut dan tulus seperti wanita. dia ini pria Anggun Tuhan, pria cantik, dia memiliki beberapa keindahan yang mestinya dimiliki seorang wanita. sepertinya dalam sekejap aku bisa menebak yang ada di fikirannya dan kesukaannya. dia suka hujan, dia suka semua hal manis, dari motif, warna, makanan, kengangan dan seterusnya. ini masih perkiraan. tapi pria ini jelas sangaat menyukai keindahan. 
aku tak berkata aku mencintainya, karena untukku cinta tak pernah sederhana.. jika benar jatuh cinta tak sesederhana ini... maka kekagumanku padanya benar-benar tak terelakkan. 

Selasa, 14 Januari 2014

another side of you.

hi blog.. so sorry for ignoring you about this couple of months. i never mean it.
well, eventually i always write this blog in the darkest moment of evening. midnight. ^_^
actually so many thing that i've been through since the last time i shared my story with you
to be honest, someone had broken up my writing hobby. he screwed up every single passion in my heart about writing, being an author or writer. i actually very connected with my stupidity.
i can't deny that no matter how much a woman tried to be careless, rational, and objective. they will give up to those who has a special place in their heart. even i'm too afraid to call it. yeah.. love
as you know that i've been struggle for year to write a novel, that finally being rejected. and as you know that i wrote it down and told soo many thing about 'him' the one that ever fulfilled my life which until now i have none right before or after him. he knows that i wrote him as one of the characters in my novel.  after so many time we're not get in touch. he finally started it. don't get me wrong, it doesn't mean i'm hoping for that. but there's a little gladness in my heart which i actually deny and insist that it really means nothing.

after some ice breaking, i eventually know that he want to read my novel. i actually really mind to gave him my novel and let him know how much i adore him in that novel..  first it would bring harm to me, remember that the whole novel must be a secret cause i'm gonna release it. 2nd, i don't want to make his had getting bigger. but i need someone to do the revision and i believe him. again, i give up . my brain cannot do any protection anymore. i gave him. he read and say sorry for treating me bad. which right now i really don't mind.. it already happen anyway. and until this second, he doesn't gave me any revision.
in my perception, he just intend to know how much a girl adore him, how much i desperate since the day he's been gone, and how much he gave big impact to my love life. and know, i really have no passion to write. I hate him. even it is more hurt than every bad things that he's done to me. it's not his fault. i just simply fool.

gratefully my sister wake me up and get my self a new chance to write all over again. in my current world, God, Dream, Family and best friend is the most beautiful things in my life. i do not even know if i could fell in love again or not, since i thought that he's a guy with the best personality ever and just lie to me and fool me. he just same. everyone does. :)

sincerely, me.

Kamis, 21 November 2013

one more meaningful moment on november 17th

one more unpredictable thing in my life. this moment really make me recognize that 'sacrifice would never be useless' At the first time i'm going to the semi final, me and my team become very excited to face the next motion. as usual, i keep reminding my team to never me ambitious. just believe in doing something best, and it will give the best result. 

me, aprisha and Ruth was sleepless , we're dying to only do research for one motion. it's something about ASEAN Free trade. we got too many confidence for believe that the ASEAN motion would be the next motion for semi final round. we really didn't sleep until the sun rise knowing that there are so many thing to browse.

we faced the morning with exhausting smile. we never forget to pray at first. but something really attacked me so hard. like mike tyson just gave me a single punch straight to my face.the ASEAN free trade motion is not the next motion. the other one from the same heading does. that was really painful and turned me down. i really feels like a dumb. i sacrifice my sleep time for something useless. to be honest, we really HAVE NO IDEA. still with our motto. 'just do the best, let's God do the rest' and miracle just happen to this dumb girl, 

here it is :